Will Smith dropped the trailer for his Best Shape of My Life docuseries Friday, and in the clip, he reveals that he had thoughts of taking his own life.

The Fresh Prince of Bel Air star is publishing his autobiography, simply titled Will, on November 9. In discussing revelations in the book with family members in the clip, including son Jaden and daughter Willow, he shocks them when he says, “That was the only time in my life that I considered suicide.”

The 53-year-old entertainer also admits that he’s not the hero he portrays in films such as Men in Black.

“This began as a journey to get into the best shape of my life,” he says to start the trailer. His goal was to lose 20 pounds in 20 weeks; however, he says he discovered he was not mentally ready.

At one point Will declares,”I don’t want to do any of this. I’m finished with ​the Best Shape of My Life.”

The trailer also shows him reading a confessional statement, admitting, “What you’ve come to understand as Will Smith, the alien-annihilating MC, the bigger-than-life movie star, is largely a construction, a carefully crafted and honed character designed to protect myself, to hide myself from the world, to hide the coward.”

The six-part unscripted docuseries Best Shape of My Life debuts Monday, November 8, on Will’s YouTube channel.

Smith also stars as Richard Williams, the father of Serena and Venus Williams, in the film King Richard, premiering November 19.